Saturday, April 13, 2013

¡Incredible India!

India. Where do I even begin? I'll be honest, I've been avoiding putting fingers to keyboard on the subject because I am not delusional enough to believe I will ever be able to fully narrate my experience the way it deserves.

Let's start off with the big new shall we?

With the country. 

Did I trick you? (At you least you Mom?)

But seriously, if love is something that consumes you to the point that you're thinking about said person (or place, in my case) while your dinner is burning, or your shower suddenly becomes twice as long because you've accidentally shampooed your hair three times, or you lie awake at night contemplating selling all your earthly possessions for a chance to see "your love" again, then damn it! I'm in love.

Maybe it's just puppy love. Maybe this will pass. All I know is that this is not the first time I have traveled to a foreign place, but this is the first time I have been so far outside of ANYTHING that is even remotely familiar to my normal life--and yet--somehow I have never felt more at home. Contradiction much? That's why I'm saying.

I'm planning on writing multiple posts to cover the different aspects of my trip. Can you smell the cheddar when I say, "But, I'm still trying to process it all?" I know I made myself gag as I was writing it. I'm sorry.

I have to start some where right? So in the words of Fraulein Maria, let's start at the very beginning shall we? (You really only have to listen to the first ten seconds to get the reference, but if you don't feel the need to listen to the whole song, I'm not quite sure how much we have in common).

Alright, musical tangent over. Where was I? Ahh, yes. The beginning.

My gorgeous friend Tina was really the one who really spearheaded this whole trip. By that I mean she planned E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G. At one point, she tried to put my in charge of figuring out which vaccines we needed and that backfired so terribly, that she took that over too. (The only other thing I was in charge of ended up being cancelled due to some possible terrorism activity. That story won't surface for at least 2 more posts so you'll have to stay tuned.)

Tina and I headed out on Friday morning to the airport and everything (besides a momentary freakout about losing my passport) went smoothly. We had a layover in Seattle where we were questioned about why weren't taking more luggage with us (as if back packing around a foreign country was completely unheard of or something). And purchased some garden burgers (because it was Friday during Lent) that tasted suspiciously like chicken, but we were too chicken ((haha get it?)) to inquire any further since we had just spent $8.00 each on the them. God spare us.

This is when shi--stuff gets real. Our next flight was a mere 13 hour flight to Dubai. DUBAI. As is the UAE United Arab Emirates. We flew with Emirates Airlines. I could dedicate an entire post to this airline. Their level of service was absolutely absurd. Did anyone catch an episode or two of the short lived Pan-am series on ABC?

If not, that's okay. It was pretty trashy. I bring it up because Emirates is the modern day Pam-am. The flight attendants (male and female, I have to stay unbiased) were supermodels. Not just supermodels, smart supermodels. They all spoke multiple languages (not an exaggeration) and had degrees in molecular biology (slight exaggeration).

Us low-lings sitting in coach were brought warm, moist towels scented with lavender, delicious meals (gluten free, vegan, halal, kosher, and vegetarian substitutes available) and any complimentary beverage (alcohol included) you could imagine. I spent a good portion of the flight sleeping, listening to classical music and NOT watching pitch perfect for the 4th time. (okay fine Pitch Perfect snuck it's way onto my screen). We thought we were living like queens. And we were, until a few hours later...

We landed in Dubai smelly, tired, and mostly just smelly. Stopped to gawk at the mutli-level waterfall in the middle of the airport (which I neglected to take a picture of because I was too delirious to even think of such things) got some food and waited for our next flight.

We chatted about our plans for India, how awesome our last flight was and what we would do if we couldn't find Jordan when we landed in Delhi. Then Tina being the smarty pants that she is, saw some people boarding the plane and suggested we go over to our gate and get in line. THIS COULD HAVE BEEN THE BEST DECISION OF OUR LIVES. When I walked up to the counter an adorable little Indian man smiled at me and gestured for Tina to come up as well. He asked if we were traveling together. When we replied, "Yes" he said he had a surprise for us and asked "Can you guess what it is?" I thought he was some hot shot that managed to snag us seats next to each other (because we were a few rows apart for this flight, but it was only 3 hours and planned on spending it sleeping so we didn't really care to change it) So, I innocently guessed, "You got us seats together?!" He smiled, showed us the tickets and said, "Even better."

Insert Ugly American here. We both just stared at the tickets, and whispered a subdued "Thank you" and walked on board. Little did we know our lives were about to change forever. WELCOME TO BUSINESS CLASS. Ever heard of it? I hadn't either. Apparently there is step between first class and coach. It's called Business Class.
You can't tell from the picture, but my legs are completely extended, and don't even come close to the seat in front of me!
The chairs were equipped to give massages. Not interested in a massage? That's cool. Just press a little button and your seat LAYS DOWN FLAT. Like a BED. Go to sleep with your plush pillow and warm fuzzy blanket. They'll wake you up when it's time for your bowl of warm nuts to be served. Or your meal with personal porcelain salt and pepper shakers. Did you fall asleep again? That's okay. When you wake up, there's a mini box of chocolates waiting for you to enjoy while you fill out that pesky customs paperwork. The flight was about 10 hours too short, but the memory remains and this princess did not enjoy going back to coach a week later.

When we finally made it to Delhi, we quickly found Jordan (PTL) waiting patiently on the other side of customs and went to go find the car we hired to take us to our hotel. We left at 10 am Friday morning, and arrived at 4 am Sunday morning. No, we were not hungry, grumpy or tired at all.

Reunited and it feels so good.

Our first group shot in the hotel before we recharged with a nap and got ready for an adventure I'll never forget.

Next time on Real Life: I went to India. Bug infested restaurants, Life endangering traffic, The Lotus Temple and more...


  1. Yeeessssssss! Love. Can't wait to read the rest!

  2. I love that you loved India and are blogging about your trip.

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  4. Camp Patton is probably my favorite thing ever (besides coffee), so when Grace posted that her sister *finally* blogged about the trip to India I couldn't NOT check it out.
    If the rest of your trip was half as exciting as the plane ride then I'm excited to read more!

    1. You are just as funny as your sis! Me loves that I have 2 Patton blogs to read! (Yes, I'm aware your last name is not Patton. If it is, that's weird. ) But I think ya know what I mean....

  5. If that is business class - what is 1st class like?!?

    Looking forward to more more more!!!

  6. I came back for more because my life is so exciting and I have such a full social calendar. aka I've barely ventured out of my apartment in the past week due to a nasty chest cold and I'm slowly going insane. (melodramatic who?) Aaanyways, 3 things. 1. The momentary passport misplacement? My aunt recently lost her passport the day before she was leaving to go to Thailand for two months. She ended up having to delay her trip for several weeks while she waited for the replacement and then had to cut the trip short. Her original passport was found shortly after this whole debacle sitting in my grandpa's scanner from when she made copies of it. Based on my family's track record of elephant-like memories for any and all embarrassing/unfortunate moments, she'll probably never live that one down. 2. I fully approve your Sound of Music endorsement. I once saw it on the big screen at my hometown's old opera house and it was possibly the most exciting moment in my little life. Try to contain your jealousy. and 3. Living large there with Emirates Air, huh? Absolute craziness. Side question in this already far too long comment: How do you manage to look that nice after that many hours of travel?? How? Is this some sort of witchcraft? I usually reach a level of hot-mess that rivals that of Ms. L. Lohan herself if my travels extend anywhere beyond the one hour mark. I'm going to go ahead and cut off this Everest of a comment here, while I'm still behind.

    1. Marathon comments are my fav! Don't ever stop!

      Emirates is the new standard by which I judge any and all things related to customer service. Let's just say McDonald's really has been a disappointment this week. Also, I'm ever so flattered by the comment on looking nice after travel. I assure you there is a "beautify" filter on Instagram Tina used. It was not pretty in person. :)

    2. No, she was really still that pretty after it all #nofilter

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